Last night was the 2ND part of the Forgiveness seminar that I started. If you read my post last week, you know that I felt it was very emotional, very intense, and I was very scared in the first part of this seminar.
Last night was a bit different, we did partner up once but mainly we had to share the things we wrote in front of the group.
I had to write down the following things:
What I wanted from the people I want to forgive? (example: explanation, apology)
What if I don't get that?
I had to write down the positive things about the people I want to forgive. I had to recognize the good things that they brought to me at the time.
I then had to write what circumstances in their lives prevented them from giving me the things I needed at the time.
I then had to read all these things as if I did not know them and see if my thoughts shifted. They did! I read their stories and I felt sorry for them. They all had one thing in common. They had a lack of father or father figure in their life. They hated themselves and what they represented. They never searched their souls to find love within themselves therefore they were not able to give me that love.
My journey to forgiveness has begun five years ago and I have made significant progress throughout the years and going to the seminar was like the icing on the cake. The conclusion of the seminar for me is that I had to go back to my childhood and remember what I envisioned myself to be as a person and as a man. I then had to work hard to try to become the man that little shy boy saw himself to be. I had to allow my friends and my family to love me. I had to uncover my talents and appreciate them. I had to find my way back to God and let him guide me which gives me the opportunity to open my mind and heart to the possibility of loving someone else just as much as I love myself.
Now with this I have a greater sense of peace in my heart.
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