Duh Moment (How Many Fluids Does a Car Have?)

Please keep in mind that today's Duh Moment reflects a time when I knew nothing of cars. Um, kinda like today.

I just had bought my first car 88 Mercury Tracer hatchback. My dad never really talked to me about cars or showed me how to care for them so I had to learn as I go. I had the car for a couple of years when all of a sudden the car would not go in reverse. I was mad as hell! I would step on the gas and nothing. I kept stepping on the gas and the car would not move and then it would jolt and finally go into reverse.

I did mention this to my dad but he paid no mind. Actually, I didnt pay any attention to his response cuz he told me what to check but he told me while I was watching All My Children and Tad & Dixie were getting married so I didnt hear a word he said. A few months went by and the car would do the same thing from time to time.

One day I was shopping at the Brickyard, yes I said Brickyard for all you Chicagoans the Brickyard was the shit! That mall was poppin! Anyway, I went into my car and it wouldn't go in reverse so I gave it gas to the full extreme and when all of said the car jumped and made a huge bang. The car was rattling so much I was scared. I drove it home and found that it wouldn't go forward now either. I was a mess getting the car home cuz the car was shake, rattle, and rollin. I finally got home and parked that bitch. I went inside calmly and said "Dad the car is messed up, I don't know whats wrong with it." He went came back and was mad as hell, like it was my fault the car was bunk!

He had it towed and the next day I was watching One Life To Live, Tina and Cord were having issues cuz Tina slept with Johnny and got pregnant. Well Tina didn't know who the father was but she told Cord she was pregnant with his baby. It was getting good. Any fucking way! Let me finish telling you all the story.

I was watching my soap, cuz it was summer time, and my dad answered the phone and all I heard was "What! It can't be! That's not possible!" I heard the phone slam and I was like "Dang someone's in trouble, I wonder what my brother did?" He asked me, "Did you check the fucking transmission fluid when I told you to?" I said "Transmission Fluid? I don't even know where that is?" He said "Where do you get your oil changed?" yelling. I said " Calm down, geez! Oil Change? Well when the oil light comes on I add more just like Erica showed me how!" That seem to enrage him even more and said "You never changed the oil?" How long have you been doing that? I was like "I dont know like a year or two"

"You fucking idiot!" he yelled. The car had no transmission fluid it was dry, no oil and no antifreeze!!! I didn't even know what those things were. He said now I have to change the transmission and it is gonna cost me 800 dollars and your paying for it!

I was like daaayum! I couldnt believe he was gonna charge me? I mean seriously, I didn't know all those items and he never taught me. So then I got brave and said "Well I shouldnt pay for it cuz its your fault for not teaching me about a car like a dad is suppose to do. So you pay for it! You never told me about no transmission much less a fluid. You just said oil and gas.

Needless to say, there was no more car for me and he was livid! I was grounded and he tried to make me pay for it but I never did.

So my duh moment is not knowing a fucking transmission or a fluid then having the nerve to blame someone else and still asked for the car as soon as it was back from the shop. Its a damn shame!